It’s worth a double-click when we managers feel intense need that our team be “happy” at work. Like a therapist would say, “it’s ok to not be happy sometimes.” Maybe we need a creative outlet of our own, besides work.
Work is work. Seth Godin talks about being “professional,” versus being “authentic” (This is Marketing, 2018). Solid approach.
Wow! Such a crisp and timely post! "Don't be a therapist" is my key takeaway. I'm in the midst of group discussions with my team and can totally relate to this.
I believe this is one of the best articles I've read in a while. No manager should ever find themselves in a position of being a therapist. It leads to extremely strong biases in performance evaluations. Work relations need clear boundaries. It's not the job of a manager to listen employees complain about X,Y or Z.
Manager must be there to listen the concerns and collaborate to resolve any frictions. Managers should also support employees during difficult times, even by suggesting time off. Ultimately, managers should help employees grow by building their resilience and ability to find solutions.
I really like the idea of a ‘right-size’ reaction and I think that is a tough thing to figure out at times - in other words it takes practice and getting to know them and yourself. If you tend towards action it will be harder to make room for them to process (and action oriented people are very valuable so there’s lots of them) If you tend towards empathy then you might make too much room…All things to notice about ourselves and them. When I was certified as a coach part of our training was the difference between therapy and coaching — therapy is about the past, the hard things that shape us. Coaching is about the future, learning from the past or the experience of something to figure out what action or practice or experiment you’re willing to do now…the next small or big step to learning and growth. I always loved that differentiator - hope that’s helpful to others as well :D Thanks Wes, as always love reading your work.
Agree with everything.. being empathic doesn't mean solving their problems for them, it is creating a safe space for them to bring their authentic selves and a safety net to take reasonable risks and learn from them
Wow, this is so timely for me as a new manager who transitioned from peer to manager and is working on this skill (and others). Thank YOU! Super insightful
Spot on, as usual. ❤️
It’s worth a double-click when we managers feel intense need that our team be “happy” at work. Like a therapist would say, “it’s ok to not be happy sometimes.” Maybe we need a creative outlet of our own, besides work.
Work is work. Seth Godin talks about being “professional,” versus being “authentic” (This is Marketing, 2018). Solid approach.
Thank you Wes!
Wow! Such a crisp and timely post! "Don't be a therapist" is my key takeaway. I'm in the midst of group discussions with my team and can totally relate to this.
I believe this is one of the best articles I've read in a while. No manager should ever find themselves in a position of being a therapist. It leads to extremely strong biases in performance evaluations. Work relations need clear boundaries. It's not the job of a manager to listen employees complain about X,Y or Z.
Manager must be there to listen the concerns and collaborate to resolve any frictions. Managers should also support employees during difficult times, even by suggesting time off. Ultimately, managers should help employees grow by building their resilience and ability to find solutions.
I really like the idea of a ‘right-size’ reaction and I think that is a tough thing to figure out at times - in other words it takes practice and getting to know them and yourself. If you tend towards action it will be harder to make room for them to process (and action oriented people are very valuable so there’s lots of them) If you tend towards empathy then you might make too much room…All things to notice about ourselves and them. When I was certified as a coach part of our training was the difference between therapy and coaching — therapy is about the past, the hard things that shape us. Coaching is about the future, learning from the past or the experience of something to figure out what action or practice or experiment you’re willing to do now…the next small or big step to learning and growth. I always loved that differentiator - hope that’s helpful to others as well :D Thanks Wes, as always love reading your work.
Agree with everything.. being empathic doesn't mean solving their problems for them, it is creating a safe space for them to bring their authentic selves and a safety net to take reasonable risks and learn from them
Wow, this is so timely for me as a new manager who transitioned from peer to manager and is working on this skill (and others). Thank YOU! Super insightful